Knee High

A recent study has shown that 67% of women aged 18-33 admit under duress the desire that the beauty of their kneecaps cause a continued sickening feeling of overwhelming envy in everyone else on earth. Sound alarming? Maybe, but it's great news for the host of aesthetic joint enhancement start-ups hoping for a boost in the market. Procedures on offer include elbow incineration, eyelid flagellation and the increasingly popular shoulder scrape, so those of you with even a single intact memory of self-respect can get down to your local practitioner and demand they set about flaying the fuck out of you without delay!