Foul Play

Looks like Kellyie Yardstick's certainly making a bid to become the nation's next WAG. The buxom ex-toothpick compiler was recently spotted coming out of a nightclub with several top footballers hanging out of her. And rumour has it she's set her sights on one Mr Franck Slakbags, Scarborough Anorexic's latest signing all the way from Luxembourg and the man with the legs that might just win the ill-fated club next week's karaoke and kick-fest championship at Dunoon harbour.